Who Is Your Inner Voice?

Do you have a negative inner voice?


Two months ago I discovered that an ex-colleague had cancer.  A lovely lady that I originally met in my first public facing role.  We parted company many years ago but until I left earlier this year still worked for the same organisation and I would run into her on occasion.   Her cancer was very progressive and when I met her in May she was reliant on a mobility scooter, but otherwise looked really well.

Last week I ran into her husband in town and asked after her.  It was one of those awful moments as he realised that I hadn’t known that she has passed away.  I was shocked that we had lost her and the whole situation was horrible with neither of us really knowing what to say.  He moved on very quickly and I wanted the ground to swollow me up.

I’ve just spent the whole week being annoyed with myself for asking how she was.  How could I be so inconsiderate of his feelings?

As I type this I know that’s a really stupid thing to say.  Having left the organisation I have lost touch with a number of people including the good old gossip grapevine. How could I have known? Yet all week that little voice in my head has been telling me I’m stupid.

I’m frequently having conversation with clients about their strategies for dealing with the voices in their heads.  Dialogues vary immensely from little green devils on people’s shoulders to wobbly pink talking jellies in the pit of a stomach, they can have names such as Fred or Horace, yet they have the same affect on us, they change the way we see ourselves.


Now that I have identified my negative inner voice, now I can develop my strategy for dealing with it.  I’ll start by persuading it to look at things in a positive light.

What does your inner voice look/feel/sound like?  And how do you deal with it? Please share your thoughts here:


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